{"id":2228,"date":"2011-12-09T01:18:27","date_gmt":"2011-12-09T01:18:27","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dianeduane.com\/outofambit\/?p=2228"},"modified":"2011-12-09T01:18:27","modified_gmt":"2011-12-09T01:18:27","slug":"the-six-tasks-of-snowman-hank-an-outline","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dianeduane.com\/outofambit\/2011\/12\/09\/the-six-tasks-of-snowman-hank-an-outline\/","title":{"rendered":""The Six Tasks of Snowman Hank": an outline"},"content":{"rendered":"
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It all started with this tweet from @DonSpeirs:<\/p>\n

“@wilw @dduane fan project for #Kimvention2012 – What do you think the 6 Tasks of Snowman Hank were? #kimpossible #snowmanhank”<\/p>\n

…All I can say is… it got me thinking. Too many people know that I love the Kim Possible series dearly, for a number of reasons including the relative smoothness with which the characters grow and change. And then the tweet reminded me of the Christmas episode, which is… quirky. (And which I particularly love for its self- and extra-referential qualities.)<\/p>\n

So I sat down for several days and did some development thinking, and then wrote. (For those who’re interested in seeing some notes on how a writer goes about making a nonexistent Christmas special out of a minute and a half of video and a few lines of dialogue, they’re here.<\/a>) And below you’ll now find what an animation writer in a hurry (and possibly also a few drinks gone in pre-Christmas cheer) might have turned in to a tolerant story editor at some 80’s network as the first-draft outline for “The Six Tasks of Snowman Hank.” (I more or less imagine the story editor as being Art Nadel,<\/a> that prince among producers, who gave many a new animation writer his or her leg-up into the industry in the Eighties.)<\/p>\n

I don’t often get to do the disclaimer thing, so here it is:<\/p>\n

The Snowman Hank character originated in an episode of the Walt Disney Television Animation\u00a0 series Kim Possible,<\/em> and therefore is the property of Disney. (But you knew that.) <\/strong><\/p>\n

This is a work of fan fiction and is copyright to Disney Enterprises Inc. if to anyone. <\/strong><\/p>\n

Everybody clear on that?<\/p>\n

Good. Then let’s roll. …One other thing: there are songs in this. Songwriting isn’t in my skillset, so I’ve merely indicated what the songs should be like, or do to the listener. Use your imaginations.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

 <\/p>\n

THE SIX TASKS OF SNOWMAN HANK<\/em><\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

ACT ONE<\/em><\/p>\n

We open on a snowy Rockies landscape over which towers the imposing and magical BLIZZARD MOUNTAIN. Running down the mountain slopes, Snowline Canyon ends in a sheltered spot called HANK\u2019S CORRAL.<\/p>\n

Here we meet SNOWMAN HANK, who for most of the year lives a somewhat solitary and sedate (if musical) life as protector of the local forest and mountain creatures. But he’s not right in the middle of his favorite time of year, and his busiest. It\u2019s Christmas Eve, and tonight it\u2019ll be Hank\u2019s job to round up the magical walking fir trees of Blizzard Mountain in his corral, and then head them down to Snowline Junction — the last stop on the steam train line that runs down to Summertown at the foot of the mountain. It\u2019s from Blizzard Mountain that all the people for miles around get their Christmas trees, and Hank knows that they depend on him to make a really important part of Christmas happen.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s almost time for the big Walking Tree Roundup, and Hank is practicing [THE TREE ROUNDUP SONG] one last time before it\u2019s time to start the real thing going. But he\u2019s interrupted in his practice by a huge ruckus outside the Corral. Within seconds a COYOTE comes tearing into the Corral in hot pursuit of a SNOWSHOE HARE. Though these two are both friends of Hank\u2019s, they\u2019re natural enemies, and they never miss a chance to make each other\u2019s life miserable if they can.<\/p>\n

Hank breaks them up in a way that suggests he\u2019s an old hand at this. The hare, JOSH, and the coyote, LUCIUS, immediately start squabbling over who\u2019s going to deliver the important news they\u2019re carrying to Hank, and he has to break them up all over again. Finally the news comes out that the rustic\u00a0road that runs up and down the mountainside \u2013 the one the Walking Trees use on their way down to the train depot — has been blocked by a landslide.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo let\u2019s go clear the way,\u201d Hank says. Slinging his trusty guitar CHANTEUSE over his shoulder \u2013 because Hank would never go anywhere without her \u2013 he heads up the mountain along with Lucius and Josh (who keep fighting all the way). This time it takes [A ROLLICKING SONG ABOUT NOT BEATING UP ON THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU EVEN IF YOU DON\u2019T LIKE THEM MUCH: TITLE GOES HERE] \u00a0to break up their squabbling\u00a0 and get them on track to be of some kind of use to deal with the blocked road when they reach the trouble spot. (The trees, already eager to get going, can be seen bopping in time to the music in the background as the three friends move along. The implication is that Hank\u2019s music is itself magical and one of the things that helps the trees move.)<\/p>\n

Shortly they get to the place where the road is blocked by a huge heap of stones and rubble. Josh and Lucius start vying with each other in trying to get rid of the rocks, but they\u2019re too small to do much but produce a lot of inadvertent physical comedy, and they make no real difference at all. Finally Hank uses his guitar again to play a MAGIC DANCE TUNE so bouncy and irresistible that the piled-up stones just boogie off to either side of the road and then roll down off the side of the mountain.<\/p>\n

Josh and Lucius cheer, and Hank, pleased, reckons that he can go back home now and start getting ready for the Walking Tree Roundup. But just as he\u2019s turning to make his way back, from further up the road someone slowly appears who none of them were expecting to see. It\u2019s a tortoise called TERRY.<\/p>\n

Terry\u2019s another old friend of Hank\u2019s, very old (though he looks fairly young) and very wise. Normally he wouldn\u2019t be out and around at this time of year, but now he looks around with the air of someone who\u2019s half expected what he sees. \u201cYup, this is about when it was supposed to happen,\u201d Terry says.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen what<\/em> was supposed to happen?\u201d says Josh.<\/p>\n

\u201cThe tasks,\u201d Terry says. \u201cYears \u2018n\u2019 years ago, the Medicine Woman of the Blizzard Mountain Tribe told me how it\u2019d happen. There\u2019d be a time when the rocks start rolling, and the rivers wouldn\u2019t flow, and the trees wouldn\u2019t walk — and a winter would come that there wouldn\u2019t be a spring after. Then someone\u2019d have to do six tasks to put it all right. Looks like this was one of those tasks\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut there\u2019s nothing wrong with the trees!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou sure about that?\u201d<\/p>\n

Worried, Hank starts playing Chanteuse and singing the TREE ROUNDUP SONG \u2013 even though it\u2019s not time for it yet \u2013 and though the trees try to get up out of the ground and follow him, they aren\u2019t able to. He\u2019s horrified. \u201cThey can\u2019t walk! And if they can\u2019t walk there won\u2019t be any Christmas trees for the kids down in Summertown!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo there you go,\u201d Terry says. \u201cBetter get started on fixing this up before Christmas comes\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank isn\u2019t wild about the idea that he\u2019s the one meant to do these mysterious tasks, but he agrees \u2013 however reluctantly \u2013 that he has to at least find out why the trees can\u2019t walk, and solve the problem somehow. \u201cWon\u2019t be easy,\u201d Terry says. \u201cYou\u2019ve got to find what\u2019s been lost and give up what you\u2019ve found\u2026 make a friend, make an enemy, underneath the ground. When the rocks start rolling and the rivers won\u2019t flow, then what can\u2019t move will show you the way you have to go.\u201d<\/p>\n

All this is obscure and troubling, but Hank\u2019s not the type to shirk a job that needs doing. \u201cBetter get on with it, then,\u201d he mutters, and starts heading up the mountain along the newly cleared road. \u201cBut how come you never told me about this before?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWasn\u2019t the time, and anyway, you never asked,\u201d Terry says as he slowly follows Hank and the others. \u201cDon\u2019t wait up for me, son, you just get going, you\u2019ve got five more tasks to do\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat kind of friend are you gonna make under the ground?\u201d\u00a0 Josh wonders. \u201cOr what kind of enemy?\u201d says Lucius. They start squabbling over which of the two clues is more important, and Hank has to separate them again. \u201cOne thing at a time, boys,\u201d he says. \u201cI\u2019m more worried about the idea that some river might stop flowing. There\u2019s only one river on Blizzard Mountain, and a lot of critters depend on it. Better go check it out\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

They make their way further up the mountain and are met by a PRAIRIE DOG named \u00a0PAULA. \u201cSnowman Hank!\u201d she says, \u201cthank goodness you\u2019ve come! It\u2019s the river!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cLead the way,\u201d Hank says. \u00a0Following Paula, they make their way to the nearby riverbank \u2013 and find the river frozen solid!<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

ACT TWO:<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cHotspring River\u2019s frozen clean over,\u201d Hank says as they survey the icy expanse. \u201cNever thought I\u2019d see the day!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHow can this be happening?\u201d Josh cries. \u201cThis is plumb freaky!\u201d says Lucius.<\/p>\n

Hank\u2019s inclined to agree. But for the moment he unslings Chanteuse and starts to play and sing [A JOLLY BREAKING-THE-ICE SONG]. As he does, the ice starts to shatter and is gradually carried away down the watercourse. \u201cThanks, Hank!\u201d Paula says. \u201cWe knew you could help!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNot sure I have, though,\u201d Hank says, reslinging Chanteuse. \u201cThat river\u2019s never frozen before, not even in the Big Snow of \u201933. Whatever\u2019s going on, it needs more looking into. Come on.\u201d And he starts uphill.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut where are we going?\u201d Paula says, falling in with the others.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou got trouble with a river, go to the source,\u201d Hank says.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou mean \u2013 the Haunted Caves of Blizzard Mountain?\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Everybody freaks a little at the very idea. But Hank just keeps going with a look of increasingly grim determination, and the others follow him\u2026<\/p>\n

Soon they\u2019re entering an area where the trees are very high and thick and close together. \u201cShadowpine Forest,\u201d Hank says. \u201cThese are the oldest trees on Blizzard Mountain.\u201d And he sounds a little uneasy, which doesn\u2019t help the others\u2019 composure. \u201cDon\u2019t normally bother them this time of year. They\u2019re full of old tree thoughts, they deserve their peace\u2026\u201d But it\u2019s while making their way through this spooky area that they start hearing strange high voices calling.<\/p>\n

\u201cGhosts!\u201d Josh shrieks, and \u201cIce goblins!\u201d Lucius yells, and both of them dive for cover (in pointedly opposite directions).<\/p>\n

But the sound has nothing to do with goblins or ghosts. Hiding from them under the huge trees \u2013 because they\u2019re as unnerved by Hank and his friends as Hank\u2019s companions are by the voices \u2013 they shortly discover two CHILDREN, a brother and sister named BOB and BABS. \u201cWhat\u2019re you young un\u2019s doing all the way up here all by yourself in this weather?\u201d Hank says, for the snowclouds are moving in.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe were looking for a Christmas tree,\u201d Bob says, apparently recovering instantaneously from being encountering a talking snowman with a guitar.<\/p>\n

\u201cOur family doesn\u2019t have a lot of money this Christmas,\u201d says Babs. \u201cOur folks said we might not be able to have a tree this year. So we thought\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou thought you\u2019d come up and try to find one for yourselves,\u201d Hank says softly.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd then we got lost,\u201d Bob says. \u201cAnd we couldn\u2019t find our way down again,\u201d says Babs. \u201cAnd we\u2019re cold\u2026 and we just want to go home!\u201d they plead in unison.<\/p>\n

\u201cYour folks\u2019ll be going plumb loco looking for you,\u201d Hank says. \u201cWe need to get you back to your family!\u201d And he looks like he\u2019d rather do nothing else. But all the same, he looks up the mountain. \u201cMight not be safe for you right now, though,\u201d he says. And as he speaks, the first flakes of snow start falling. It\u2019s getting dark\u2026<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll take them down the mountain, Hank,\u201d says Lucius. \u201cI\u2019ll help him,\u201d says Josh.<\/p>\n

Lucius starts bristling. \u201cI don\u2019t need your help, you varmint \u2013 \u201d<\/p>\n

But Hank shakes his head. \u201cBetter if we all stick together,\u201d Hank says. \u201cSafety in numbers.\u201d He tries to sound cheerful and confident, but the look on his face as he leads the group out of the Darkpine Forest and onward up the mountain suggests that he\u2019s not sure how safe they\u2019re all going to be. He starts playing and singing [A CHEERFUL WE\u2019RE-ON-AN-ADVENTURE SONG] as they head up the mountain, and the kids and animals chime in. But Hank is worried\u2026<\/p>\n

The snow is falling faster now, and it\u2019s almost night as the group reaches the place where Hot Spring River comes out of the mountainside. The river\u2019s banks are almost completely covered with ice and the river\u2019s stream is narrowed to a mere trickle:\u00a0 almost as they watch, it freezes over again.<\/p>\n

\u201cThought this might happen,\u201d Hank says. \u201cI\u2019ve got to go in and find out what\u2019s going on. ‘What doesn’t move will show you the way…’\u201d To the children he says, \u201cHate to say it, but I think you\u2019d best come with: we still ought to stay together.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re not afraid,\u201d Babs says.\u00a0 \u201cMuch,\u201d Bob says.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s the spirit,\u201d Hank says. \u201cJust keep your eyes open. We\u2019ll sort out whatever\u2019s wrong in there and get you back down to Summertown and your family by Christmas.\u201d<\/p>\n

The kids produce flashlights they\u2019ve wisely brought with them. \u00a0Everyone\u2019s a little nervous, but Hank\u2019s unwavering certainty that good will prevail becomes the solid center around which all of them coalesce, like the single grain of ice at the heart of a snowflake.\u00a0 All together, they move into the cave and vanish in the darkness\u2026<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

ACT THREE:<\/em><\/p>\n

The group makes its way deeper and deeper into the cave, weaving their way among stalagmites like stone Christmas trees and stalactites like huge stone icicles. Though they\u2019re creepy, the caverns are also glitteringly beautiful, and even Lucius and Josh, who\u2019ve been paranoid about ghosts, are beginning to relax a little.<\/p>\n

At one point, however, the kids become too cold to go on, and the party pauses for a rest and to try to warm them up. There\u2019s no point in trying to cuddle up to a snowman, and Hank knows he can\u2019t be of any use to Babs and Bob that way: but all the other critters crowd in close, and shortly Bob and Babs are wearing a coat of live snowshoe rabbit, coyote and prairie dog fur. Hank unlimbers Chanteuse and sings [A HEARTRENDINGLY SEASONAL SONG ABOUT THE IMPORTANCE OF FAMILY: SOMEBODY GET SONDHEIM IN HERE, PLEASE, OR ELSE RAISE JOHNNY MARKS OR IRVING BERLIN FROM THE DEAD]. And as he sings the part about looking for a family until you find one, the critters exchange sad glances.<\/p>\n

The kids, rested and warmed up, now jump up and are ready to carry on. Josh, though, and Lucius, have a quiet word with the snowman. \u201cHank\u2026 you know you have a family. You have us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know I do.\u201d But it sounds like Hank\u2019s not terribly sure. He gets up. \u201cCome on, folks. We should get moving. The sooner we\u2019ve found out what\u2019s going on here, the sooner we can get you kids back down to your nice warm house in Summertown\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

They start moving again through the cavern and are surprised when ahead of them they hear a voice calling for help. Hank immediately follows it: the others rush headlong past him, and alarmed, Hank hurries to stop them. Which is a good thing, because in the darkness they nearly fall into a bottomless crevasse! They just manage to stop in time — though Josh and Lucius pitch over the edge together. The crisis of the moment forces them to bypass their normal sniping and help each other up and out.<\/p>\n

Carefully the group makes its way around the edges of the crevasse to the other side. Far down the passage they can see a faint light, and between them and the light there\u2019s the silhouette of a skinny wavering shape. \u00a0To their surprise, they find it\u2019s a snake (in a Stetson) named BOOMSLANG BILL. As they get close to him, Bart coils up and rattles and threatens them. \u201cYou consarned little varmint!\u201d Lucius says, but he\u2019s not willing to get too close. Neither is Josh. Paula, though, seriously annoyed at what just nearly happened to the other two, simply flings herself at Bill and sits down on him just behind the head.<\/p>\n

He thrashes around, but can\u2019t make any headway: Paula is substantial. \u201cYou can torture me, but I won\u2019t talk!\u201d he shouts.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou better stop wiggling around or I\u2019ll give you something to talk about, snake boy!\u201d Paula says.<\/p>\n

But Hank steps in. \u201cNo need to be mean to him just because we got off on the wrong foot,\u201d he says. \u201cSo to speak. Pardner, what\u2019d you mean by acting like you were in trouble? You nearly made us fall right down that almighty hole!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI was following my master\u2019s orders! He told me to do it.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYour master, huh,\u201d Hank says, grabbing the snake out from under Paula. \u201cAnd just where might he be?\u201d<\/p>\n

The snake indicates the faint light down at the end of the tunnel, and starts shivering. \u201cDown there\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s where it\u2019s coldest, all right,\u201d Josh says. All of them are feeling colder now.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I reckon he\u2019s the one we\u2019ve come to see,\u201d Hank says, \u201cso you\u2019d better just bring us to him. You have any problems with that?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes!\u201d Bill shouts. \u201cUh, actually, no,\u201d he adds a lot more quietly.<\/p>\n

\u201cGood,\u201d Hank says. \u201cYou do right by us, son, we\u2019ll do right by you. Lead the way.\u201d<\/p>\n

The group heads toward the faint chilly light in the distance. \u00a0Boomslang Bill is plainly confused by the treatment he\u2019s receiving. \u201cHow come you aren\u2019t\u2026you know\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNobody\u2019s gonna torture anybody, snake boy,\u201d Paula says. \u201cWe don\u2019t operate that way. What\u2019re you doing working for some bad guy anyway?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMy mom said I had to,\u201d Bill says after a moment. \u201cShe said this job would be perfect for me. Because I was so cold-blooded\u2026\u201d And suddenly he bursts into sobs. \u201cI never asked to be cold-blooded!\u201d<\/p>\n

The critters exchange skeptical looks. \u201cSounds like an occupational hazard for a snake,\u201d Josh mutters.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s just the problem! I didn\u2019t want to be venomous! But there are all these expectations <\/em>\u2013 \u201c \u00a0\u00a0Bill continues to vent, while the other critters, somewhat bemused, take turns listening to him.<\/p>\n

At the end of the tunnel they soon find a huge cavern, definitely haunted\u2026 but not in the usual way. At the center of it is a DARK, MANLIKE SHAPE on an icy throne.\u00a0 In the entrance to the cavern, everyone freezes at the sight.<\/p>\n

Then Hank unslings Chanteuse and very slowly moves toward the throne. It\u2019s a gunslinger moment: snowmen don\u2019t wear spurs, but you can almost hear them jingling.<\/p>\n

The shape on the throne doesn\u2019t move, just watches Hank come. The watcher looks like Jack Frost gone bad, a Black Bart-like anti-Santa in black and icy silver Western attire. \u00a0Around the crown of the black Stetson he wears is a second crown of ice, and the cavern around his throne is filled with nasty-looking four-legged ICE GOBLINS that growl and glare at the visitors.<\/p>\n

Hank, though, stays casual and grimly calm. \u201cWho might you be, stranger?\u201d he says. \u201cAnd what\u2019re you doing on my mountain?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m King Zero,\u201d says the figure lounging on the throne. \u201cAbsolute Zero\u2026 but you just call me Zero.\u201d\u00a0 He chuckles. \u201cI\u2019m from as far away West as you can get\u2026 right out past the Sun, where there\u2019s nothing but night. I\u2019m what\u2019s darker than night, and colder than any winter in the world. And as for what I\u2019m doing here, why, I came to see you, Hank!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMe?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course. Who hasn\u2019t heard of Snowman Hank and his famous enchanted guitar, and the magic mountain they guard? I thought I\u2019d mosey out this way and see the man, or shall I say snow<\/em>man, for myself\u2026see if he\u2019s all he\u2019s cracked up to be. And now that I\u2019ve seen your neighborhood\u2026 I think I like it here. Might just settle down\u2026 forever.\u201d<\/p>\n

The children and all the critters shiver with dread, and Hank plainly isn\u2019t pleased by the prospect. \u201cWouldn\u2019t have thought you\u2019d mind, Hank,\u201d says Zero. \u201cYou\u2019re a snowman. Summer\u2019s your enemy.\u00a0 While I\u2019m here you can go anywhere you like, any time of year, instead of having to stay all alone up above the snowline like a prisoner.\u201d<\/p>\n

The \u201cnot being alone\u201d reference plainly hits Hank where it hurts. But he shakes his head. \u201cSome kinds of alone ain\u2019t so bad,\u201d Hank says. \u201cAnd you moving in here would mean there\u2019d be nothing alive on the mountain soon, or for miles around. Even the trees would die. Can\u2019t have that.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDon\u2019t rightly know that you can get rid of me, though,\u201d says Zero. \u201cDon\u2019t think you have the power. And now that I\u2019ve got you here, here you\u2019ll stay, you and your friends.\u201d<\/p>\n

He gestures, and the snarling ice goblins move in from all sides, cutting off any retreat and surrounding the visitors. Zero laughs an evil laugh as the children cling to each other in terror and the animals shiver in fear. \u201cWe\u2019ll have a long long while to get acquainted. Forevermore\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

ACT FOUR: <\/em><\/p>\n

Everyone is (understandably) thoroughly freaked out by the idea of being prisoners of the evil Zero inside the icy mountain for the rest of their lives (if not longer). But Hank is holding his nerve. \u201cIf it\u2019s me and Chanteuse you came to see,\u201d Hank says, \u201cthen I don\u2019t know if it\u2019s smart to antagonize us.\u201d Zero turns a cruel, cold look on him. \u201cBut on the other hand,\u201d Hank says, \u201cif we\u2019re so all-fired famous, then maybe you\u2019d like to find out why.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cA private concert?\u201d Zero says, and smiles a wicked smile. \u201cYou interest me strangely.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019ll play and sing my best for you,\u201d Hank says. \u201cBut there\u2019s a price to pay.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd what might that be?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou let the children and my friends go free.\u201d<\/p>\n

Zero considers this with nasty pleasure for a moment. \u201cThey\u2019re not important,\u201d he says. \u201cDone.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd one more thing,\u201d says Hank. \u201cIf you\u2019re not afraid to have a little gamble.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAfraid??\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank ignores the threat in the word. \u201cI bet when I sing for you, I can make you cry.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I do?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThen you\u2019ll take yourself right off my mountain and never come back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd if I don\u2019t, and you lose?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank shivers. \u201cThen you can stay. And when the others go, I stay too.\u201d<\/p>\n

All the critters and the children shout \u201cNo!\u201d \u201cYou can\u2019t do it, Hank!\u201d \u201cWe need you!\u201d<\/p>\n

But he\u2019s not listening. And neither is Zero. \u201cTo have Snowman Hank as my personal entertainment for all of time\u2026\u201d A long pause, and another of those awful smiles. \u201cDone again. Sing your song.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank lifts up Chanteuse and strikes a chord, and SINGS. And sure enough, at the end of [AN IMPOSSIBLY TENDER SONG ABOUT LOSS AND LONGING THAT WOULD MAKE EVEN A BROADCAST STANDARDS AND PRACTICES SUIT CRY], one lone tear steals down Zero\u2019s cheek (and freezes there).<\/p>\n

Zero is obviously furious at losing the bet, but for the moment he holds still. \u201cAnd now,\u201d Hank says, \u201cif you\u2019ll excuse us, we have to go — \u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it\u2019s too late for you already,\u201d Zero says, and smiles another of those wicked smiles. \u201cDon\u2019t you understand? It\u2019s almost midnight on Christmas Eve, and your time\u2019s up. \u00a0Not all the tasks are done. The river\u2026 the blocked road\u2026 finding the lost\u2026 and facing me down at the heart of Blizzard Mountain… those four things you\u2019ve done. Soon, when you take the children home as you promised, before it\u2019s Christmas, you\u2019ll lose what you found, and that\u2019s the fifth task. But you still won\u2019t have brought the trees down to Summertown. That\u2019s task number six, the one you\u2019ve always done easily every year until now. Not tonight, though. You\u2019ve only got time to do one or the other before midnight. And if the trees don\u2019t walk before Christmas Day\u2026 I can come back.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

Everyone gasps. Even Hank quails at this awful news. But after a moment he straightens up and looks at the guitar in his hands \u2013<\/p>\n

And throws Chanteuse to Josh, Lucius and Paula. \u201cTake her and run for it!\u201d<\/em> he cries, snatches up Bob and Babs, one under each arm, and flees.<\/p>\n

“Take me with you!” Boomslang Bill cries. Paula grabs him, and the whole crowd runs back the way they came through a cavern now trembling with Zero\u2019s rage. Stalagmites totter and stalagmites rain down from the cavern ceiling, and there are near-misses and close calls, but with help from Boomslang Bart, who knows the way better than any of them, they manage to break out into the open.<\/p>\n

Down at the mountain\u2019s foot, the bells of Summertown strike quarter to twelve on Christmas Eve. Hank doesn\u2019t give the rest of the group a moment\u2019s thought: he bellyflops down in the snow. \u201cGet on my back!\u201d he shouts to Bob and Babs, and the moment they do, he throws himself over the nearby cliffside and starts the wildest toboggan ride down the mountain that anyone could imagine.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a scary ride but also a wonderful one \u2013 for what could be better than tobogganing down a mountain in the moonlight on the back of a snowman who knows the way? Bob and Babs hang on for dear life, laughing all the way \u2013<\/p>\n

Until they come to the bottom of the mountain, and Summertown. In the distance, Hank can hear voices calling the kids\u2019 names: and he sees lights moving around as their parents search for them. At the bottom of the mountain the kids jump off and run to their folks, and Hank stands and watches this, happy even though he’s also deeply troubled.<\/p>\n

As he turns to look back up Blizzard Mountain, he spots Terry the tortoise coming slowly toward him. \u201cNice work, Hank!” Terry calls. “I knew you\u2019d get it all handled. The road unblocked \u2013 the river unfrozen \u2013 the one who got it that way sorted out — those lost kids found and brought back to their folks \u2013 \u201c<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it doesn\u2019t matter, Terry! Christmas in Summertown is ruined. There aren\u2019t any trees to gather around and sing carols on Christmas Eve. No trees for the presents to be under first thing in the morning.\u00a0 I never did the last task. I failed!\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n

Terry tsks at him and leads him back down around the last curve in the mountain road. \u201cHank my boy\u2026 does this look like failure to you?\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank turns and stares\u2026 for hundreds of trees are making their way down the mountain, and the children and adults of Summertown are rushing out to greet them. The Walking Tree Roundup is under way without him! Leading the way are Lucius (carrying Chanteuse on his back) and Paula and Josh (helping steady the guitar on either side), while the guitar triumphantly plays the Walking Tree Roundup song by herself! Scrambling along after them are a horde of Josh\u2019s snowshoe rabbit relatives, helping act as informal traffic cops to guide the trees to the families waiting for them. Everyone sings and dances around the trees as they walk to where they\u2019re needed, settling themselves down in front of people\u2019s houses to be decorated out in the open.<\/p>\n

A crowd of Summertown\u2019s kids, led by Bob and Babs, rush to Hank and dance around him, too, singing, \u201cTo the people far and near, Snowman Hank brought holiday cheer!\u201d<\/p>\n

Hank is dumbfounded. \u201cBut I <\/em>didn\u2019t do it \u2013 \u201c<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course you did, you big snow-brained galoot,\u201d Terry says. \u201cMaybe not directly. But you helped them <\/em>make it happen!\u201d He laughs. \u201cWho said you<\/em> had to do all the tasks? You gotta learn to delegate, son.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess I do!\u201d Hank laughs, as Josh and Lucius and all the others run over to him with Chanteuse. \u201cHow\u2019d you get down to the Corral so fast? And then down here?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSame way you did,\u201d Lucius says.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou rode my guitar down Blizzard Mountain?\u201d <\/em><\/p>\n

Hank grabs Chanteuse from them: she twangs happily as Hank gets his mittens on her and spins her around to make sure that she\u2019s okay. Boomslang Bill promptly falls out of her, headfirst into the snow. \u201cI helped steer!\u201d Bill shouts, somewhat muffled by the snow and his hat.<\/p>\n

Terry chuckles. \u201cAnyway, Hank, you should know that Christmas always comes if you make room for it! You<\/em> made the room\u2026 by being willing to set aside what made you happy for what someone else needed more. And it\u2019s more than that\u2026\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re right.\u201d And Hank breaks into the first verse of the song that lies at the core of the story, while his friends gather around and join in the singing.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s not the turkey and the stuffing,
\n\u201cOr the gifts around the tree:
\n\u201cIt\u2019s a warm and fuzzy feeling
\n\u201cThat begins with you and me!
\n\u201cPut away those petty problems
\n\u201cAnd embrace your fellow man;
\n\u201cThen join the celebration
\n\u201cAll across this wonderful land!<\/p>\n

\u201cHave a ringlin\u2019, jinglin\u2019,
\n\u201cKris-Kringlin\u2019 Christmas!
\n\u201cHave a Hopalong, singalong, happy holiday!
\n\u201cAnd when the snow starts falling,
\n\u201cWe\u2019ll voice a hearty cheer
\n\u201cFor the rootin-est, tootin-est, high-falutin-est
\n\u201cFavorite time of year!\u201d<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

We now start the second verse (somebody else can write this, I\u2019m sure) which will continue over the end titles. But first the camera pans back up to the top of Blizzard Mountain, where Zero is standing outside the cavern entrance, looking down at the light and happy activity. For a moment he frowns. Then as a shred of the song floats up to him, his face relaxes, and he rubs one black-gauntleted finger over the spot where that tear froze, and sniffs once or twice\u2026 and smiles. \u00a0\u201cOh well,\u201d he says under his breath to his minions, \u201cThey say Greenland is nice this time of year.\u201d<\/p>\n

And he vanishes, leaving us to watch the celebrations down at the foot of the mountain as the adults and children of Summertown, some strangely assorted animals, and a singing snowman, all join together to welcome Christmas\u2026.<\/p>\n

\n

(For some notes on how this outline was written, click here.<\/a>)<\/p>\n

\n

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