{"id":988,"date":"2006-07-12T21:06:32","date_gmt":"2006-07-12T20:06:32","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.dianeduane.com\/outofambit\/2006\/07\/12\/the-wisdom-of-dave-barry\/"},"modified":"2006-07-12T21:06:32","modified_gmt":"2006-07-12T20:06:32","slug":"the-wisdom-of-dave-barry","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dianeduane.com\/outofambit\/2006\/07\/12\/the-wisdom-of-dave-barry\/","title":{"rendered":"The Wisdom of Dave Barry"},"content":{"rendered":"

…whose stuff I’ve always loved, especially the line about the new definition of “apostrophe”: “Look out, an S is coming!”. But these is so much good sense here that I’ve copied the whole thing. (And there’s a link back to the source.)<\/p>\n

Fourteen Things That It Took Me More Than 50 Years To Learn\u2014by Dave Barry<\/a><\/font><\/font><\/p>\n

\n
    \n
  1. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.<\/li>\n
  2. If you had to identify, in one word, the reason why the human race has not achieved, and never will achieve, its full potential, that word would be “meetings.”<\/li>\n
  3. There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”<\/li>\n
  4. People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.<\/li>\n
  5. You should not confuse your career with your life.<\/li>\n
  6. Nobody cares if you can’t dance well. Just get up and dance.<\/li>\n
  7. Never lick a steak knife.<\/li>\n
  8. The most destructive force in the universe is gossip.<\/li>\n
  9. You will never find anybody who can give you a clear and compelling reason why we observe daylight savings time.<\/li>\n
  10. You should never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.<\/li>\n
  11. There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.<\/li>\n
  12. The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above-average drivers.<\/li>\n
  13. A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person. (This is very important. Pay attention. It never fails.)<\/li>\n
  14. Your friends love you anyway.<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    Thought for the day: Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

    …Perfection. <\/p>\n

    [tags]Dave Barry, humor[\/tags]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    …whose stuff I’ve always loved, especially the line about the new definition of “apostrophe”: “Look out, an S is coming!”. But these is so much good sense here that I’ve…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":4,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[38,51],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-988","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor","category-online-life"],"yoast_head":"\nThe Wisdom of Dave Barry - Out of Ambit<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.dianeduane.com\/outofambit\/2006\/07\/12\/the-wisdom-of-dave-barry\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Wisdom of Dave Barry - Out of Ambit\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"…whose stuff I’ve always loved, especially the line about the new definition of “apostrophe”: “Look out, an S is coming!”. 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