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What household doesn’t need one of these?

Via BoingBoing: “French’s mustard denies French connection.”

The weirdest sentence in this article (assuming it’s true): “Last week, Air Force One replaced ‘French toast’ with ‘Freedom toast’ on its menu.”

Did it really? What unimaginative copycats the AF1 menu-makers are. Why don’t they do their lonesome allies a good turn and call the dish by its honorable (and much older) British name, “Poor Knights of Windsor”? (And this isn’t just anybody’s eggy breakfast toast. This stuff has muscle. There’s half a cup of sherry in there, for pity’s sake! That’ll fix your hangover.)

…Sheesh.

This from the people at Scriptorium:

“Just a quick note to all our newsletter readers about an alarming font
phenomenon we stumbled on recently. This discovery raises some
serious concerns about fonts installed on your computer.”

(Fellow “font geeks”, you really need to see this.)

This entry is just a test of the “Blogbar” utility, a toolbar-based Blogger window for IE. And it works. Meanwhile, is it just me, or is Blogger behaving strangely this morning? I don’t seem able to edit my template for some reason: hit the “Template” tab and all I get is a blank box. I’m reluctant to tamper with it when it’s acting this way.

Oh well. Meanwhile, the weather broke fairly conclusively yesterday evening: it rained with some enthusiasm for the better part of the night. However, Met Eireann claims this rain will shortly clear away and leave us with another high pressure system in dominance. I don’t think I’m going to complain…

Meaning that this may make less sense than usual, or none. I have a few glasses of wine in me, which can cause me to become goofy.

We were out at the pub, celebrating. We had a phone call earlier today from our German producers (the ones to whom we sold the miniseries) and they let us know that, among other things, they want us to retool it as a theatrical feature. (I.e., a Movie.)

Yeah. (Old “Savarin Coffee commercial” SFX: cheering crowds, etc. “And the PEOple are HAPpy!”)

So we came home from the pub after a while, and I went online to check the mail and do a little surfing, and found this: Blogshares: fantasy trading based on the popularity of blogs.

Is it just me, or does this seem a tad…self-referential? …Then again, this page does introduce us to some fascinating concepts, including “hostile takeovers of blogs.” (Boy, that’s one to think about. What happens the day BoingBoing takes over Instapundit? To paraphrase JMS, you set up a lawn chair outside the office and start selling tickets.)

Never mind. This strikes me as a good time not to worry about my blog’s share rating, but rather to go upstairs, climb into bed, and start reading The Worm Ouroboros again.

Night, all.

One of the ingredients of “Unholy Guacamole”, courtesy of the HalfBakery.

(Best comment on this, from “snarfyguy”: “I was at a Trader Joe’s in Boston last weekend where I saw some premade guac. The container had a picture of a guy with a mortarboard hat and lots of mathematics symbols floating around. The brand name was [are you ready?] … Avocado’s Number.”

(Ow, ow, ow, ow, pun pain!)

Via Major Fun’s Daily Briefings: SINGLECELL and DOUBLECELL, two “volumes” of interactive art / stuff.

Via the Geisha asobi blog: check out this link. Scroll down to the cat costume labeled “Young lady blouse”. The expression seems to say: “You’re going to post these pictures where??”

The fractured English would appear to be artifact from a mechanical translation program. I don’t know about you, but the phrase “cat pudding” keeps bringing me up short.

This, however, is just art. Touch the drips, and things happen. The controls come up when you move your cursor over the three dots at the lower right-hand corner.

I really do love Samuel Pepys. Today’s entry in his journal suggests one of the reasons why.

Here he gets involved with a poor schnook named Banes who, while drunk, yells a politically ambivalent/indiscreet remark out of a boat at a time when the British government (such as it was in that weird transitional time between the fall of the Commonwealth and the return of the King) was at least as twitchy as, well, as the US is today about threats to the local body politic and “national security”. The man’s been arrested as a result of the remark. Pepys plainly feels kindly toward him: so, it appears, does his boss, Lord Montagu. Separately the two of them come to the conclusion that the comment-yeller is no threat (besides seeming “much of a gentleman” who “speaks French and Latin very well”), and Montagu comes to the conclusion that the man can be released. I can’t help but think that Pepys influenced his mind somewhat in this regard, though. And at the end of it all, “…I went up and sat and talked with him in Latin and French, and drank a bottle or two with him; and about eleven at night he took boat again, and so God bless him.”

A few years ago, when the unedited Diaries came on the market in paperback, I bought them for Peter — he having always felt strongly that he would prefer to decide for himself which parts of the work were interesting and which weren’t. …Probably his favorite quote:

“…thence to the Theatre, where I saw again ‘The Lost Lady’, which doth now please me better than before. And here, I sitting behind in a dark place, a lady spat backward upon me by a mistake, not seeing me. But after seeing her to be a very pretty lady, I was not troubled at it at all.”

And a couple of my favorites:

“July 1 [1660]. This morning came home my fine Camlett cloak, with gold buttons, and a silk suit, which cost me much money, and I pray God to make me able to pay for it.”

“25th (Christmas-Day) [1665] To church in the morning, and there saw a wedding in the church, which I have not seen many a day; and the young people so merry one with another, and strange to see what delight we married people have to see these poor fools decoyed into our condition, every man and woman gazing and smiling at them.”

They do? Cripes, where does the time go? (The answer to that question is probably a novel. Don’t get me started.)

But this shows you what my world is like lately. I don’t find out about this from the local TV or newspaper: I find out about it from somebody else’s blog. (And what he has to say about it is not only fascinating, but complex enough to make my head hurt. Then again, I haven’t had my tea yet. Note to self: Go Get Caffeine.)

“Scholastic Does About-Face on New Potter; Won’t Sell Them Direct”

The prospect of dealing with scores of angry booksellers has helped persuade Scholastic not to presell Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix through its book fairs division after all.

After the ABA and assorted members spoke out last week, Scholastic has decided to modify the program so that it drives customers into stores. Students can still order through the fairs, but instead of picking up the book at the warehouse, customers who order Phoenix through the school fairs will now be given a coupon that they can redeem at participating retailers. Scholastic will reimburse stores for every coupon they receive. Scholastic has cancelled plans for parties at the warehouses and the facilities will only be open to accommodate customers who can’t make it to stores.

The change in policy was outlined in a letter from Scholastic senior v-p for the trade group Michael Jacobs that was sent to American Booksellers Association headquarters, directors of regional associations and ABA board members. Jacobs wrote that “our goal has always been to make the publication of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix the biggest bookselling event of the year and that’s what we’re doing.”–Jim Milliot (PW Newsline 3/25)

(Further to this:)

[Participating retailers] will receive a $20 credit from Scholastic for every coupon they redeem with one of the books they’ve ordered, plus ten hats of their own to give away. Stores will have the chance to sell other books to these customers, or add them to a customer list. There will be no warehouse parties to compete with what booksellers have planned.

Cissy Greenbaum of Westwinds Bookshop in Duxbury, one of the more vocal opponents of the original policy, told PUBLISHERS WEEKLY, “It’s wonderful that Scholastic heard how upset independents are and will redirect the business to our shops.”

This new policy will also, of course, spare millions of American parents the trouble of learning where the nearest Scholastic warehouse is. (JLBell/RAWI/PW)

(It’s great to see that this has sorted itself out this way. Just about every bookseller I met during the signing tour was livid about what Scholastic’s previously announced sales policy was going to do to their own businesses, come the release date.)

if we were in NY at the time (and we might be, due to business travel. This is as much a note to me as to any of you who might be interested…). But it’s a topic which I often find myself considering. One which the author, finally, has to handle himself or herself: but other people’s take on the problem would be interesting to hear. And I’d go a long distance, in any case, to hear Joyce Carol Oates talk about anything whatsoever.

15 May – PEN CHILDREN’S BOOK PROGRAM: DARK REALITIES: HOW MUCH TRUTH CAN AUTHORS SHARE WITH YOUNG READERS AND WHAT MIGHT BE BOUNDARIES TO OBSERVE, BARRIERS TO BREAK THROUGH?

Participants:
CHRISTOPHER PAUL CURTIS received the Newbery Award and the Coretta Scott King Award for his second novel, Bud, not Buddy. His first novel, The Watsons Go To Birmingham–1963, was a Newbery Honor Book.

PATRICIA REILLY GIFF is the author of over sixty books for children. She has received Newbery Honor Awards for her novels, Pictures of Hollis Woods and Lilly’s Crossing. The latter was also a Boston Globe-Horn Book Honor Book. Texas Bluebonnet Award.

WALTER DEAN MYERS is the author of many works for children and young adults. His novel, Monster, was the winner of the Michael L.Printz Award and a finalist for the National Book Award. Struggle for Freedom, Scorpion, and Somewhere in the Darkness were Newbery Honor Books.

JOYCE CAROL OATES is the author of many novels, short stories, essays, and poetry. Her novel, them, won the National Book Award, and he has had five National Book Award Honor Books. Her most recent work for young adults is Big Mouth and Ugly Girl.

ADAM RAPP is the author of Missing the Piano, named a 1995 ALA Best Book for Young Adults. His other acclaimed novels include 33 Snowfish and Little Chicago. Mr. Rapp=B9s play, Nocturne, was selected by Burns Mantle as one of the ten best plays of the 2000–2001 season.

The Moderator will be WENDY LAMB, Vice President and Publishing Director of Wendy Lamb Books/Random House Children’s Books.

When: Thursday, May 15 2003, at 7 p.m.
Where: THE STANLEY H. KAPLAN Penthouse, Lincoln Center, Rose Building, 10th Floor. 165 West 65th Street
For reservations call: 334-1660, Extension 107
Free for PEN Members: five dollars for non-members
Presented by The PEN Children’s Book Authors Committee

This event is made possible with public funds from the New York State Council on the Arts, a state agency.

(Thanks to my friends at the Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (see also http://www.scbwi.org/), who sent me this heads-up in one of their weekly e-mails.)