From a (post-) theater review in the New York _Times…_

“‘The only authentic musical I ever worked in was called “Lock Up Your Daughters,”‘ Mr. [Patrick] Stewart said, out in the street after the show. ‘I played a character called Mr. Squeezeum, so you get some idea of the kind of musical this was. This was in my repertory days.’

“(Remember any numbers?)

“‘Lock up your daughters, give me the key,’ Mr. Stewart began. Then, ‘I usually don’t do this without pay.’

“(The spirit of conga is on us — give us one little verse.)

“‘Lock up your daughters, safely at home,’ Mr. Stewart sang. ‘Lock up your daughters where fancy cannot roam. Whether your daughter is pretty or plain, once she has done it, she’ll do it again!’

“(Oh, do go on!)

“‘No, no, that’s enough. I’ll only sing more for money.'”

(chuckle)