A mixed bag, as I kind of suspected. (But nearly all funny, one way or the other. My favorite (surprise, surprise) comes from the paper of record:
It’s all a little reductive and soap-operaish, and viewers unfamiliar with the source material may find themselves a little puzzled about the relationship between the evil characters Alberich and Hagen, or even to learn, almost as an afterthought, that bathing in the dragon’s blood has rendered Siegfried invulnerable. On the other hand, “Dark Kingdom,” which was shown on European television nearly two years ago, is not unwatchable. Made for about $25 million, it looks as if it cost much more, with lots of Nordic-seeming ice and mist, and a dragon that, for once, really looks like a dragon, squatty and lizardlike. The director, Uli Edel, who also made the 2001 Arthurian mini-series “Mists of Avalon,” has a feel for scenery and pageantry, and for the most part he tells the story straightforwardly, without condescending or camping it up.
By far the best thing in “Dark Kingdom” is Brunhild, played by Kristanna Loken, Arnold Schwarzenegger’s nemesis in “Terminator 3,” who was a molten, shape-shifting cyborg that most often assumed the form of a blond hottie. In “Dark Kingdom,” with her furs, her blond dreadlocks, her martial-artsy way of wielding a spear, she’s fierce and sexy — a true Valkyrie, a warrior both on the ice floes and in the bedchamber. When King Gunther, who has won Brunhild’s hand by deception, tries to claim his husbandly rights, he is instantly unmanned with weakness and performance anxiety.
(chuckle) “Not unwatchable”: that’ll do nicely. …And herewith a few responses from out in the blogosphere:
This feature premieres as a mini-series on SciFi this week, but it’s also being released on DVD at the same time. I scratched my head when the commercials hyped it as the best story to pre-date the Lord of the Rings. With the world’s blandest title, I somehow doubted it. After doing some research, I see that its original (European) title was Ring of the Nibelungs. Now that makes more sense. Yes, the germanic myths that were the basis for Wagner’s operas did have a certain influence on Tolkien. I guess the SciFi Channel didn’t trust its audience to watch anything with “niebelungs” in the title.
Ding! Correct. (Probably, anyway, since this complaint kept coming up as regards other English-titled versions. We kept hearing from Channel Four in the UK, “No titles with ‘lungs’ in them. Sounds too gross.”)
I’m in the middle of the Sci Fi channel’s “Dark Kingdom” miniseries. The story looks good, but the leading actor can’t act for crap. I think they were going for Viggo Mordenson and had to settle. At least he’s kinda’ pretty to look at.
(innocent look) No comment.
Oh crap it’s back on. *cries* Wait wait, no, NO! I’m going to watch it anyway! I’ve waited this long, I’m at least going to see what comes of things!
Exactly how I felt about year three of this project.
Just finished watching Scifi’s Dark Kingdom. Pretty generic fantasy story but I enjoyed the lounging time with the cat anyway. Gotta love naked men bathing in dragon blood (ewww) and meteors that make women horny. LOL! It sure seemed to me like every character, male and female, were so arrogant. I will check out tomorrow’s installment since I don’t work until late.
You have no idea how much trouble they had with that blood. As for the meteor…ah well. Never mind about the meteor.
They have switched the parts around completely! *returns to head palm* It is not Kriemhild that Siegfried loves – it is Brünhild. Oh, and Siegfried arrives in ‘Burgundy’ (Worms? oh, where’s that?) a peasant son of a Blacksmith. Hagen is still his wonderful Hagen self. Fafnir has been reduced to an overgrown Iguana. And Alberich is now a Gollum wannabe. Only hairier, and thicker (I mean he is a dwarf after all… lol).
But that’s the problem with the Nibelungenlied. No matter which version of the story you try to tell — and there are many — you absolutely aren’t going to be able to please everybody.
So true.
Vera Farmiga (especially when she was in “Roar”) and Benno Furmann (from “Dark Kingdom: the Dragon King”) should play twins. They have the exact same eyes and facial structure — it’s eerie!
Note: This should in no way be taken as an endorsement for Dark Kingdom! There’s only so much Julian Sands one can take (although he’s somewhat more fetching as a brunet).
That’s the first time I’ve seen anyone use the masculine version of “brunette” in years. You get a gold star and a cookie.
The movie is surprisingly awesome. I just didn’t know what it was going to be about.
Fair enough. Occasionally, in mid-rewrite, neither did we. 😉
…And there are many other comments out there, both positive and potentially crushing. Good thing we’re both in the middle of other movies at the moment, and don’t have the time to get particularly crushed.
This one, though, I have to wind up with, from the SciFi boards. Re Kristanna Loken:
I would very much like to enjoy her company in the meteor burrow of her choice.
Ding!
